Psychics: Maintaining Your Boundaries
Note: A medium is someone who acts as the go-between. You’re in the middle, acting as the conduit between the ghost world and ours. Most mediums are psychic. Not all psychics are mediums.
In general, ghosts and spirits can’t take over a person without his/her permission. Even misguided ghosts aren’t that powerful. Really.
I’m not talking about demons or malicious spirits. That’s another topic. I’m seeing increased reports of demons and malicious entities, but it’s still a very small issue in ghost hunting.
When someone is dealing with a demon or possessions, I refer them to John Zaffis, Pete Haviland, or NEAR. (Note: This article was written long before John Zaffis became a household name due to his Haunted Collector TV series.)
However, there are times when a medium — or someone developing his or her psychic gifts — feels an unwanted presence in her field of energy, or even in her mind. (I’ll use the feminine pronoun in this article, but this advice is for men and women alike.)
Whether or not you’re psychic, always know where your boundaries are… and when they’ve been crossed.
Start by recognizing how you feel without the influence of others, including spirits.
Start your day with a reality check
First, see how you feel when you start the day. I’ve talked about this in other articles, notably Baseline… Yourself, in my free Introduction to Ghost Hunting course, and in my podcast (plus free worksheet), Baseline Yourself for Ghost Hunting. (Podcast currently unavailable.)
Here’s a quick summary:
When you wake up each morning, pause before getting out of bed and do a reality check. I mean that literally:
- Check your emotions. Are you cheerful or grumpy? Calm or anxious?
- See how you feel, physically… healthy, allergies, etc. Do you feel energized, or is it especially difficult to get out of bed today?
After completing that “baseline” check, it’s time to look ahead. I like the phrase, “pave the road.” That is, visualize how your day is likely to go, and how you’ll feel as you accomplish items (specific items) that you intend to complete.
During the day, pause regularly to see if you’ve accepted energy or emotions from people or the environment around you.
During each ghost hunt, pause regularly. See if you’ve been gradually accepting impressions from spirits. It’s best to notice this before it becomes a problem.
If you’re feeling imposed upon by spirits, re-center yourself.
- Use your morning feelings and emotions as your reference point. (My free baseline instructions and worksheet can help.)
- Remember how you felt then, and do your best to re-experience those feelings.
Some psychics use creative visualizations to protect their personal space. Here’s one way to do that.
- Imagine a real, physical room in the “psychic space” where spirits contact you.
- Create a visual sense of boundaries… physical walls with windows and a door. Imagine your perfect room in your perfect house, with perfect views out windows on at least three sides of the room.
- Make this very clear and very specific. Write it down, if that helps. Or, use a photo from a decorating magazine, or a place where you’ve lived or visited.
- Decide that you are the only person who can enter the room through the door. Perhaps its similar to a door in Star Trek, and only responds to your voice. The door always works. You can always leave the room and return to your own world easily and immediately.
- As a psychic, imagine that you’re opening only one of those windows (with a screen) to talk with the spirits. If, at any point, you want to close the window, you can. Or, you can turn your back on that window, and look out at least two other windows with happier views.Spirits cannot enter this room, but only communicate through the window. Make the screen electrically charged, if that helps. Imagine a line of salt along the window ledge, since–in folklore–ghosts generally can’t cross salt.
- Make sure the room seems real to you. It’s your spiritual haven in a “between-worlds” space. Mentally visit it every morning, and remind yourself of its decor, and how restful and safe it feels.
- Use this imagery whenever you are preparing to contact (or open to) spirits. Treat it very seriously; this space is as real as you make it. It is
Rely on spiritual protection, if you need it.
As long as you’re dealing with ghosts — not demons — the following methods have been successful.
- Use tried-and-true spiritual protections, including crosses, pentacles, stars of David, holy water, sage smudges, and so on… they work.
- Sea salt seems to work well, too. According to stories, it’s a line that ghosts can’t cross. (Interestingly, some people report take kelp daily to reduce or prevent anxiety attacks. I use it myself when I’m stressed. Kelp’s composition is similar to salt’s.)
- If you say to a spirit, “I banish you from my presence in the name of [deity],” they usually go away.
But, you need to repeat whatever you’re using regularly until the spirit/s get the point. Like persistent suitors who won’t take no for an answer, some spirits need to be told steadily and firmly that they are not welcomed.
When you’re dealing with ghosts, there is nothing to be afraid of.
Keep in mind that, along with psychic gifts, people are also given psychic protection. It’s mostly a matter of activating it.
Whether you choose a spiritual protection from your religion, or use creative visualization to keep spirits from intruding, there is little to fear as long as you remain alert and keep your boundaries in place.
Ghosts can be bullies, but ghosts aren’t dangerous. (Other entities can be, but that’s not what I’m talking about, here.)
Most spirits respond to what you say, out loud. As silly as it may seem, it’s helpful to say “Leave me alone,” or “Step back, you’re intruding in my space,” if you need to. Say it loudly and clearly, and be firm about it.
Most ghosts do not follow anyone home from ghost hunts. If they could leave the location that they’re haunting… well, they’d have left it long ago. Something is holding them there, and it’s usually a self-imposed limit.
Daily “reality checks” will help you discern how you feel, and more quickly recognize external influences from the spirits.
Remember, if you reassert your personal boundaries when the problem is small, it’s easy to keep spirits from intruding where they shouldn’t go.